She Was Cute, Not Interested.

I'm snowed in at my other job at the airport. Again.

Last month I got snowed in at the airport, and I vowed not to find myself in the same situation again. I'd call in sick, I said. Tell the boss my car just wouldn't make it, and hang up the phone before a word of refutation could be uttered (been reading John Adams, and the 18th century-speak is creeping into my vernacular.)

Instead I'm wasting away what could be a beautiful day for drinking. What's better than an (actual, because "she dumped me/I dumped her/I took a dump on her" doesn't count) excuse for drinking mid-day? Grab some buddies that can't get to work (most people don't get up at 4am to get yelled at, but we can't have it all) head over to your nearest bottle shop (might I suggest this cozy place?) and grab a few bottles that'll tide you over to warmer weather.

These are my suggestions:

-Start off with something big, since it's so damn cold - but not overly hoppy because you wouldn't want to ruin your palate on the first beer (so none of this.) An English Barleywine,
perhaps? If you can find an '09 bottle of Legend Barleywine (which, if you haven't bought one already, you can't) then drink it. It may be better in a few years, but with global warming, this very well may be our last snow day on Earth.

Then we'll have to drink Corona.

-Slow down the pace there, buddy, 'cause it's a long day (especially if you'd got up at 4, then decided that the roads were too bad like you were supposed to.) If you've got some mucus-ey buildup (you dirty boy) from the Barleywine, then it's Dry Irish Stout. Beats the pants off of Guinness. If you still need some viscosity in your life, then THIS. Seriously, one of the best beers I had in 2009.

-Now you can step up the hop profile, because your tongue is probably getting close to shot. Pale Ale is a good bet, maybe something on the sweeter side. If you're feeling brave, you could have a Tripel. This one is a winner because it's so damn tasty, and at something like six bucks a bottle, it's one of the cheapest representations of the style.

-You've earned it. Time to pleasure/pain your tongue with a shitton of lupulin. While everyone has an opinion on the best IPA/DIPA/IIPA/BigAsHellHoppyFuckingBeer, I kind of like this one. So much hop, so much much malt. So much going on that at this point you wont appreciate it.

Of course, you'll probably just guzzle this crap all day. Fucking hipster.